Dienstag, 5. Dezember 2006 15:39
Anthony Steven Gilbert kommentiert exklusiv für den VfB Cricket Club das zweite Testspiel England vs. Australien: The Ashes
Heute: Adelaide Oval Tag 5
Dear All,
SOD IT!
Sincerely,
Tony.
Just joking! Well, if I didn´t laugh, I´d cry. What were the fateful words I (and many others) used yesterday – “the draw is now favourite”! Hmm. England achieved the virtually impossible, and snatched defeat from the jaws of … a draw! After an overnight total of 69-1, England lost their last 9 wickets for just 60 runs in 40 overs, being all out just before tea, and leaving Australia just 168 to win.
Apparently, Strauss was victim of a decidely iffy caught off bat & pad decision by Steve Bucknor, replays showing it was pad and pad, but the finger went up, he was out top scorer on 34, and when Bell was victim of a terrible run out for 26, the rot set in: Collingwood hung around for 22 not out, Jones was the only other batsman to make double figures, with 10, and even extras, at 11 the 4th highest contributer to the total, couldn´t prolong the agony past tea. Warne ended with 4 for 49 (I think his parents named him after “Shanus Horribilis Anglicanus” which is latin-aboriginal for “he who walks all over Pommie batsmen”, or something to that effect?), Lee 2-35 and McGrath 2-15, both generous lbw´s given by Rudi Koertzen against Harmison and Anderson, but by which stage the blood lust was so high that the Pope batting no.11 in his debut match would have been given out for a golden duck if the ball had so much as even approached his pads, let alone hit them in line!
36 overs to get 168, to grind the Poms into the dust, and go a decisive 2-0 up in a 5 test Ashes series; game on! Langer went early on for 7, and Martyn may have arrogantly wafted a catch off Flintoff late on for 5 (but then you have to play yourself into a position where you can be able to waft arrogantly at anything?!), but Ponting, 49, and especially Hussey, maturing fast with a superb 61 not out and Michael Clarke with 21 not out, brushed aside any lingering doubts and with 3.1 overs to spare, the Second Ashes test was in the bag marked “Australian Cricket Team – not to be removed without permission”!
England now have the dubious distinction of being the Test team to win the toss, bat first, score the now highest total of 551-6
AND declare, and still lose the Test – oops! Doubtless there will be a few more unwanted records for England still to come out of the wash of this match!
Jonathan Agnew, summing up on BBC Radio 4`s Test Match Special,
commented that the usual award of a “champagne moment” would be suspended, because as far as England were concerned, there weren´t any – champagne moments, that is; a bit harsh on Hoggard for his brave bowling, and Collingwood for his double ton, only the 3rd achieved by an Englishman in Oz, but now he´s also joined Dennis Amiss (in 1969 v W. Indies?) as an England batsmen to score over 200 and still end up on the losing side!
Perhaps more pithy was Aggers later comment that the highlights were on BBC 2 TV tonight at 11.20PM, “well after the watershed”, i.e., late enough for small children, pets, and adults of a nervous disposition not to be upset by them, to put it mildly! Perhaps the final words, for NOW, should justifiably go to an Australian, the much afore-mentioned S.Warne, who when asked for his first thoughts by ABC Radio, when still breathless from his rush up the steps to the dressing room and search for his first – of many! – lagers, was heard, I think, to say that Australia`s bowlers had “bowled their nackers”, a not oft heard expression in the Northern Hemisphere, but one which, if VFB Oldenburg´s resident Aussies, Calvyn & Marcus, can stop celebrating long enough to confirm, roughly translates as “bowled their socks off”, the polite version, or, less polite, “bowled their b******s off”, to be more vernacular! A pretty fitting Australian comment on events; blunt, dry, and to the point!
As for an English view on matters, sod it, as mentioned way above, Christmas is cancelled, especially for the England squad, and might I suggest for the traditional Fancy dress party on tour, sackcloth and Ashes for the costume design, all round – get it?
Well, that´s me done for now, Second Ashes Test done and dusted; I´d like to say it´s been fun, but it hasn`t … well, not much, anyway! Bah, humbug!***
Yours, in search of the aspirins and the industrial strength ear plugs to blot out any noise of partying pom-bashers,
Tony.
*** Scrooge, from “A Christmas carol”, by Charles Dickens,when asked on his thoughts about the Festive season, goodwill to all men, and all that rot ….! T.T.F.N.